Immortal
by LIFTDramaGurl7
Summary: "This spell gave Magnus everything he had ever dreamed of, right in the palm of his hand. So...why couldn't he just let himself capture it? Claim it for his own?" One-shot


Disclaimer* Characters belong to the lovely Cassie Clare :)

**Immortal**

Magnus Bane sat in the floor in the darkness of his room. He was leaning against the side of his bed, knees pulled up to his chest, and his head in his hands.

The Book of the White was open, lying on the floor in front of him. The spell on the pages before him seemed to be cruelly taunting him.

It was a spell for immortality.

Alec's beautiful face flashed behind his closed eyelids. His shaggy, dark hair framing his face like black silk. His high, sharp cheekbones giving his face a flawless structure. His smooth, pale skin that stood out in stark contrast against the rosey blush that so often colored his features. The slight imperfect curve of his lips that gave them an unintentional seductive look.

Then came his eyes. Alec's eyes were Magnus's favorite physical feature of the boy. The dark cerulean that burned brighter than any flame Magnus could create. Those eyes that could both threaten, when he was Alec the Shadowhunter, and adore, when he was just Magnus's Alexander. The way they shined with love or darkened with desire whenever he looked at Magnus.

Alexander Lightwood was everything to Magnus. For the first time in his 800 years of life, Magnus had felt that he had finally stumbled across his soulmate. He had been in love many times over his long existence, but none of them had been able to capture his heart and hold it as tightly as Alec did. None of them had made him that he would die without them by his side. The separation from his past lovers had not terrified him as much as his separation from Alec did.

Magnus looked down at the spell. Of course, he wanted to keep Alec with him forever, never having to worry about his ineviatable death. No more waking up in the middle of the night, screaming for Alec not to leave him. He would give anything for it. Alec had already proven that he was more than willing to give up his mortal life to spend forever with Magnus. He wanted to become immortal. This spell gave Magnus everything he had ever dreamed of, right in the palm of his hand.

So...why couldn't he just let himself capture it? Claim it for his own?

Turning Alec immortal would be unforgivable. Magnus couldn't bear the thought of forcing Alec to stand and watch as his loved ones all grew old and faded away. He couldn't steal Alec's life from him because of his own wants. Making Alec immortal would be the most selfish act Magnus could ever commit.

_But he wants to,_ a selfish voice inside of Magnus's head whispered. _He told you he could handle it._

"But he doesn't understand," Magnus sighed. He looked at the spell once more. Images of eternity with Alec flashed through his mind. It caused his heart to swell with joy, then shatter because he knew that it could never be.

Magnus closed the Book of the White. He didn't even know why he had searched for the spell in the first place. Maybe he had become a masochist, getting off on the agony the spell's words threw him in. _If Alec finds this,_ Magnus thought as he placed the book back on the shelf,_ he'd beg me to use it. That, combined with my own selfish desires...I don't think I'd be able to tell him no..._

The buzzer of his apartment broke him out of his painful reverie. A sad smile spead across his face. It was Alec. He checked his hair and make-up, and wiped away his tears. He couldn't allow Alec to know something was wrong.

Magnus let Alec inside, and Alec immediently took Magnus into his arms.

"Hey," he greeted, kissing Magnus gently. Magnus smiled back at Alec, despite the turmoil raging inside of him.

"Hello, darling." He kissed Alec again, this time with more passion. He clung to Alec, fighting the tears in his eyes as he contemplated how he was to face eternity without his beloved Alexander.

***Yeah it's sad. Sorry if I bummed you out. Hope you enjoyed it all the same. Please R&R :) (By the way, I'll update me other story, **_**My Life as Alec,**_** as soon as I can)**


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